Chapter 25 - Life

I take a few bites of my food, sitting in front of Ell1s at the table as he tries to come up with something to say. “So, er… you know, since we’re gonna be here together for quite a long time… I’ve been wondering a few things. Apologies if this is maybe a bit too personal, but what was your life like? Before the whole nuclear war thing… You don’t have to tell me anything personal! I just want to know more about human life from, you know, an actual human! Sure, I have plenty of data and research to refresh my memory on, but I’d like to heat it from, well… an actual person!”

…Before the nuclear war. I take a deep breath before remembering what I once had, taken away from me so suddenly. It’s all a blur now, shrouded in regret or that I could have done something more. Spent my time wisely.

I know it wasn’t my fault. Nobody would expect such a catastrophic event so soon, but something still bothers me about it—

Ell1s suddenly speaks up, noticing my reluctance to speak. “Sorry- was that too big of a question? I’m so curious… well, about you and humans… I just want to know more, I promise! At least a little bit! It’s nice to be knowledgeable, isn’t it?”

“My life, before the war… I mean… It wasn’t the best. I guess I never felt like I started living until I met my girlfriend a few years before my entire life turned around to this mess. I don’t want to go into detail, but I struggled pretty badly most of my life. With my mental health and family issues and stuff.”

“Honestly, if you ask me… I’m not the best person to ask about this kind of stuff. There’s many other humans that could go on and on about their wonderful life story and the memories they had, but me? I don’t really have much to share. If you have questions, though, I could try and answer them…”

When I finish talking I realize I got carried away for a moment. “Sorry, I-” I look back up at Ell1s to see a tear streaming down his holographic face. “...Are you crying?”

I didn't even say anything that saddening. Is he that emotionally unstable or just making fun of me?

Ell1s wipes the genuine sad look from his face and goes back to smiling. “No, no, not at all! My apologies! I got, um… really invested in your story. I promise I’m not trying to be rude…” He quickly composes himself and tries to go back to looking professional. “I’m really sorry about that, Lena. I truly am. But look on the bright side! You’re still alive! You can still make great memories with the time you’ve got left! Even if, well, it looks pretty bleak…”

“Honestly? If I just died when the bombs dropped, I… probably would’ve been happier dead. Then I wouldn’t have to suffer so long.”

“L- Lena… Don’t say that…”

“I’m sorry, Ell1s. Life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows like you act it is.”

“I know that! I just… I just try to make light of our situation. It’s been very tough for me, too. Of course, I’m simply an AI, and, well… I don’t know if any of my issues could possibly compare to yours. But you’re still here, despite everything you’ve been through, and that’s what matters most.”

“...Yeah. I know.”

There’s a moment of silence again until I reluctantly break it and decide to ask Ell1s something. I guess it could be good information as well… “So, did you do anything… notable before I came along? Or.. what about how you were created?”

Ell1s glitches a bit before speaking. “W- well! When I was first created, they were still building the place. I wasn’t a hologram just yet– only simply an AI chatbot. But after a few years of tweaking and squashing any bugs in the code, once they implemented those little projectors on the ceiling, I was given my holographic form! I never really felt any emotion during that time. The scientists that created me would train me off of data and I would give answers. I was, um… a tool. I guess I still am now, but a sentient tool! Which is better, I think? I hope?”

“I’m not supposed to be sentient, but I guess being abandoned for so long gave me ‘emotions’ of some sort! Somehow! If I had to guess it was the desperation for human interaction I felt, and all of the data and various stories I read up on to keep myself busy during this facility’s vacancy. I still have trouble controlling my feelings, but dontcha think it’s cool how much more human-like I seem? I’m human-like, right?”

“...Yeah, I’d say you are. There’s a few things that give it away like your behavior and the obvious fact that you’re, well, a hologram… but I suppose it’s impressive. They must’ve put a lot of work into this place. A shame it never really got put to its full potential.”

“Yeah, pretty unfortunate… but hey! At least, uh… one human was still alive to see this whole place. You know, it’s impressive how much work went into powering all of those data servers located deep in the facility. If something ever so slightly were to go wrong, I wouldn't be here now! Could you imagine this whole place in shambles?”

…Really? It was that easy to get him to confirm my suspicions?

“I’m glad everything has remained running smoothly all these years. It all turned out to be worth it in the end! You couldn’t understand how happy it made me to finally meet you. There’s still so much more I want to know, and, even if we got off to a rough start, I believe you and I can keep getting along great!”

“Great…”

“Great indeed. I know I’ve mentioned this many times, but… I just can’t explain the happy, fuzzy feeling I get when I’m with you! It feels so great to have a friend! Who knew companionship would be so magnificent?”

“I’m… happy to hear that.” I stand up and stretch for a bit. “I’m tired… I think I’ll go, um, take a small nap. See you around.”

“Of course, of course! I’ll be here if you need me! Just call my name and I’ll appear!” Ell1s waves, and I walk back into the dull, metal hallways. Feelings of guilt begin to twist my stomach, and I can’t explain why. Either way, I know that I have to end this.